You can be a Ninja too!

Monday 11 June, 2007

At work today I got chatting about Ninjas (we all do it don’t we?) and someone sent me a link to the image below.

With this information it has now become possible for any of us to join the Ninja elite. No training is needed. All you require is a t-shirt (preferable black and old) and the will to transform yourself into a killing machine.

Be aware: Ninjas tend to send us code of what they’re planning to do, unfortunately that most humans simply cannot comprehend these messages with their feeble brains. Here are a few that I have taken the liberty to translate for you.

  • You “see” a Ninja somewhere = Prepare to die
  • A Ninja makes eye contact with you = Prepare to die
  • You are performing your daily routine like a good cyborg does = Prepare to die.
  • You utter the phrase, “hey check this out guys” = prepare to die
  • “Where’s my dog?” = your dog is preparing to die
  • A ninja shakes your hand = Have a nice day… then you’re going to die.
  • You come home to find a Ninja reading the paper and using your toilet = You can’t knock on the freakin door? Prepare to die.
  • You see an innocent-looking old man walking toward you, desperately asking you for help = Run if you want, but he’ll catch you up anyway. (Ninjas usually disguise themselves as old men, which increases their cool factor)
  • You do NOT see a Ninja = Prepare to die
  • If you are a Ninja = Prepare to kill someone.
  • If you are a Pirate = Prepare to die

So That’s about all you’ll need to know to become a Ninja. Good luck.

PS. You can’t really be a Ninja .


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